Signs That Your New X-Wing Is A Lemon
by the readers of TheForce.Net

10. The INCOM label is freshly painted just above a badly scratched-out YUGO label.
by Shaeri

9. Your squadron leader annonces the piloting arrangements and when he tells you which X-wing is yours, the whole room sniggers
by Ari

8. Your R2 unit laughs when it hooks up to it
by stan sembroski

7. The targeting computer gives you a fatal exception error
by yendreck

6. Due to missing S-foils, appears to be a "sideways-V" wing
by Rob London

5. Your X-Wing explodes after being rear-ended by a TIE Fighter
by Terry Letourneau

4. The so-called "laser guns" appear to be old cardboard wrapping paper tubes
by Conor Edmiston

3. After trying to turn the engine over, the navcom says "Give it up, yutz. Try saving the galaxy tomorrow."
by The Great Jedi Wannabe

2. The exterior is 80% Bondo.
by Captain Chris

1. Each X Wing purchase comes with a FREE copy of the "Holiday Special"!!!
by String Theorist

---

10. "Carmax" license plate holder
by mroulier

9. Over 100,000 parsecs on the odometer
by Mark Vaughan

8. It has "23 Skiddoo" and "4 X-foils, no breaks" painted on the side
by Grandma Tarkin

7. Your targeting computer can only pick up reruns of "Happy Days"
by Randall Flagg

6. Instead of finding the included R2 copilot, you see a large white barrel with a happy face painted onto the side
by bronski

5. Instead of landing skids you have Firestone tires
by Lucas Khoo

4. You try to lock S foils in attack position but get something shaped more like a G.
by ctco

3. When you hit the horn it sounds a lot like "Lowrider"
by Rafiennes

2. One word: sawdust!
by Totally Jade

1. Han Solo takes one look at it and breaks out in uncontrollable laughter
by Darth Penelope

---

10. The readout displays the Windows "Bluescreen of death" during takeoff
by J-P Renaud

9. The only thing between you and the vacuum of space is a layer of Saran Wrap.
by Conor Edmiston

8. When it's made out of paper
by Stranded in space

7. The tell-tale "Pinto" logo on the chassis
by Darth Bagel

6. It has a revolutionary "Flintstone" method of propulsion
by diskerror

5. Free R2 unit made of cardboard
by darth please put this one on the site

4. You find out too late that there is no rear deflector shield
by Jedi Girl of Corellia

3. When you buy it the salesman asks if you would like some ice tea with it
by Puke Bootscraper

2. The cassette "Figrin D'an's Greatest Hits" is stuck in the player.
by The Great Jedi Wannabe

1. The stablizer keeps knocking loose, the targeting computer switches off at critical moments, and you aren't a main character.
by Red 5